Wednesday, June 20, 2007

From a Dog's Mouth

A late walk around the buffet I call Capital Hill. A lot of not too hungry litter-bug diners tonight in the neighborhood. First there was the almost empty MacDonald’s French fry bag, then not one but two Popeye’s chicken boxes. In the first one I only managed to lick a few scraps of skin, but the second box was almost full. Of course at this hour some ants had discovered it first. And me, being on the end of a leash, I couldn’t get far, before the whole delicious experience was rudely taken away from me. Even the tasty ants crawling all over my face were all brushed off rather harshly. Then I come home to that dry food and they wonder why I have no appetite for it.

Why is it always these dry almost tasteless things they put in my bowl and I get in trouble for eating anything good? Then people think I am rude if I don’t gobble up the free bones they offer at the hardware store and the frozen custard place. Yes, frozen custard for people and Milk Bones for dogs. Milk Bones by the way are these bland “treats” that don’t taste like milk or bones. I have tasted both and I know. I’ve had milk substances a few times when I was alone with the table. There was the yogurt I licked off some strawberries early one morning(and a bad scene followed that one) and the half empty cups of chai tea I find once in a while. I think she has switched to soy milk and it isn’t half bad. I would eat a Soy Chai bone. And I like cheese. A nice goat cheese brie treat sounds good.

I am not an unhappy dog by nature. I make the best of what I find every day. I appreciate having food given to me. I just think if I find some snack I should be allowed to eat it.

It has gotten so bad on walks that I am yanked around regularly in certain spots. At the end of our ally there are piles of peanuts every morning. No, that’s only for the squirrels. Then there are lots of things around the dumpsters. No, that’s too dirty. I find a dead bird. No, it might have the plague. It’s a wonder to me that dogs even survived in the world with all the prehistoric cave dogs running around eating whatever they wanted. They didn’t have anyone taking fried chicken with ants out of their mouths.

2 comments:

Avalanche said...

I agree, Deefor. My human is always taking things out of my mouth and scolding me. I try to growl at her but then I risk losing the precious snack. She is smart and persistent and usually gets it away from me. See you Friday, Love Avalanche.

Deefor said...

Friday? What's happening Friday? I thought folks were acting kind of sneaky around here. Try a little bite. I know it's mean, but it really scares them.